Tuesday, 8 July 2014

Outward-focused self-esteem

I tend to have an outward focus for my self-esteem. I want to be loved and appreciated. This has a way of being naturally disappointing, because compliments and appreciation (except from my wife) can be pretty thin on the ground. It's also something I can't control. You can seek to be loved, aim and plan, perhaps plot and scheme to be loved, but ultimately you pin your happiness on other people, and it's going to be a letdown.

The only thing you can control is yourself, and as much as I know this, I fall back on external expectations. I think it's because I don't know what to do with myself to build self-esteem. How do I become the kind of person I respect? Self-improvement has always been a little bit hit and miss with me, and if I knew how to change that, it wouldn't have been a problem in the first place.

For the most part, I only know how to be negative with myself. I know it doesn't do any good, but it's a hard habit to change.

Mokalus of Borg

PS - I just can't break down a self-esteem goal into small, achievable, measurable steps.
PPS - Any hints? Anyone?

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